I’ve had a few friends who were really into opiates, mostly fentanyl. It’s been really nice to sit with them and watch “Twin Peaks” or “Law & Order” (because for some reason it’s always “Twin Peaks” or “Law & Order”) for long afternoons blending into evenings blending into night until I either fall asleep beside them or finally decide to go home,
and I’ve never minded taking them on cigarette runs or out to get groceries, or even bringing their cigarettes or groceries *to* them if they’re having an especially slow slump,
but the thing is: beneath their patches, or buried at the bottoms of their pill bottles, is real human pain they can’t take away and that will probably never get better
and that’s the killer, that’s the hard and unbearable and really *real* part right there.
It’s normal to respond to others’ pain with empathy; it’s unhealthy to romanticize it and feed off it, much less try to duplicate it.
“There’s too much hurt involved in trusting addicts. You start to compare yourself to the inanimate vice of their choice. If your father, or mother, or best friend knows how much they hurt you every time they drink, or snort, or inject their drug, but they continue to do it anyway and rip your heart into pieces, you can’t help but believe that they must love that drug more than they love you. And if your love is valued below that of a substance, it’s easy to start to feel pretty goddamn worthless.”—From Who Rescued Who?, an essay from my collection Asleep at the Controls. (via plansfornigel)
deathlyglitter said: LOL have you seriously met people who tried heroin because of how it looked??? requiem 4 a dream has gone too far
I blame the worship of ’70s dude-punk, as channeled through Vivienne Westwood in that unfortunate styling of “heroin chic” for its proliferation in pop culture; didn’t Mischa Barton’s character on The OC shoot up or something? (I have no idea). I guess it seems really romantic to kids who aren’t socially disadvantaged, but we can’t all be David Bowie and admittedly I’ve never got the whole thing about Kate Moss.
“Maybe the men – and I’m sorry, but they are all men – sending the notifications of impending unsolicited “anal” bothering don’t realise it will actually be me who reads the emails – or maybe they don’t care either way. But in order to get to the messages from people who genuinely wish to share something with the band, I must filter through every condescending and offensive message we receive.”—Lauren Mayberry (of CHVRCHES) Read her entire article here - Chvrches’ Lauren Mayberry: ‘I will not accept online misogyny’ (via intricatelysimple)
Also Lauren Mayberry is a tiny hardass and she don’t take any shit.
So there was this big show at the Columbus Theatre to mark its first year of reopening, and I was there working for the venue. As such, my hands were busy for most of the night, so fortunately a number of photographers were on hand to document the shenanigans.
Here’s a photo essay about it. You’ll see me in there, along with a number of other cool cats — including past and present members of The Low Anthem, if they’re your jam.
But that’s not all. It was a gas. It was dirt and magic and glitter showers. As good as these shots are, they’re only half as good as the reality.
See you there next year.
Don’t do the things you think you should be doing — like be a doctor, get the postgraduate degree, or acquire the high-salary-paying job. Worry about it all less. If you have more fun, you could possibly even accomplish more.
- Your 20s are for defining; your 30s are for refining. Your 20s come with the freedom to explore, the opportunity to push the boundaries of yourself, and the room to discover where all your extremes lie. Your 30s are for refining what you learned and uncovered in your 20s and bringing your dreams to fruition.
- You can’t avoid the bad shit. It will always find its way to you somehow.
- Look fear in the eye, and outsmart it. I wish I’d made this my number-one priority in my 20s. You can and should get advice from friends and strangers on how they do it, but your fears are your own, so the antidote will probably be your own, too. Dig deep and be brave. I know now that it’s impossible to be good at anything if you avoid challenges and never fail. A failure that gets its ass back up off the floor and tries again will not only be better prepared, but will always have the crowd on its feet in raucous applause.
- You haven’t got life figured out yet. Although it may feel like it, because life is hitting you like a thousand epiphanies slapping you in the face. And, you may never. But, if you do somehow find enlightenment, I imagine it will only be in the context of you. So, humble yourself and keep listening and learning. The wisest know they know nothing at all.
- If you don’t know what you want to do with your life yet, do everything you love and do it hard. One of those things will surface as more important than the others. If after you’ve put in time, love, and energy, it still doesn’t feel right, you can always always change your mind.
- I can guarantee there will be haters, but it’s only logic that there’ll be lovers, too.
- Don’t be afraid to ask for help. People want to help you. But, don’t arrive empty-handed — prove your interest by doing your research first.
- Not everyone you’re friends with are friends worth holding on to. Honor the friends that persist when you’re at your lowest. They are the absolute real deal. The rest aren’t bad people, but they aren’t helping you grow either. Don’t be afraid to let them go, and wish them a wonderful life as they exit yours.
- Other people’s views on life are not more relevant than your own. I don’t care if they’re older than you, better educated than you, wealthier than you, or shouting louder than you. Your perspective on planet Earth is exceptionally unique, and therefore your voice is equally as valid as anyone else’s.
- A skinny waist will never, ever get you the [partner] of your dreams. The [partner] of your dreams knows you pick your nose on the toilet and loves dancing with you around the living room to Frank Ocean in underwear.
- Have fun learning about yourself, because “winning” is not growth. Not a sexy-looking résumé, not good hair and flawless skin, nor keeping to the same path as your parents. To be accomplished or successful is to be as honest with yourself as you can humanly manage. Getting to know all your flaws and all your attributes alike and accepting it all. From that point on, anything is possible.
Also because I suck at Tumblr app, I posted text in the dialogue format but am not going to go back and fix it because those fucks are better given elsewhere if I even had them to begin with, which hahaha no — drugs.
My mom has been sick. For a rather long time, actually — we’re talking years — but recently she had a heat- and stress-induced neurological event that made everything worse and has really impacted her functioning. Compounding that, there are no jobs in America right now and she can’t get a paying position even if she was well enough to work at full capacity.
Oh, and one of her cats is sick. If you know my mom, you know she loves her cats and will take care of them before she takes care of herself, so this is a big deal.
In between now and the time when my mom either gets a job or has her disability application approved, she and her cats need money to live on. I’ve been helping her, but since I personally live on spinal-disability payments and sparse-and-far-between freelance cash myself, things are kind of tough.
So as it goes, we turn here, to the internet. Because you all know what to do. Reblog the crap out of this if you’d like. Don’t feel pressured to donate … but whoever does have the means to throw in a few bucks, be aware that my mom squees like a kid and gets kind of choked up whenever someone does. (She’s new here.)
Thank you all from the bottom of my weird and dark heart …