this has been your Saturday night at the paleotreehouse
Look what they do in the s n o w
They have a prequel
There are a ton of these videos. Now you know what I’m doing tonight.
THIS IS SO GOOD
“I mean, it’s not like groupies don’t exist, but acting as if every woman who likes music is a groupie is pretty much like writing “sexist asshole” on your own forehead with a sharpie.”
tonight at the Trocadero
Greg Farley named me president of the Felice Brothers Fan Club and invested me with the power of Banhammer.
RESPECT MY AUTHORITY
Today I bought my first pair of new glasses in like four or five years. My mom used to hold it as a matter of some pride to go forever between new pairs of glasses, but either I have worse eyesight than she does or she’s half blind all the time, because I’ve been feeling this ever increasingly over the past few months and am really ready for a change. When I’m squinting everyday and my depth perception starts to go, I become a human health risk from always walking into things or being perpetually irritated from thinking everyone is about to walk into me.
After the eye exam, I went straight to the opthamologist’s to the second-party optician’s — and since I had my pupils dilated to the size of dinner plates, it was kind of a trip. Just take a look at these babies.
Clearly I wore sunglasses and walked quickly on the shady side of the street, keeping as much distance between myself and other people or standing objects as possible. I was almost there when, after a series of successful near-misses, someone backed straight into me on the steps of the Puck Building. I screamed, but just kept walking because I didn’t trust myself to stop. It probably wasn’t even the weirdest thing that happened on the steps of the Puck Building today.
(The butter-marinara spaghetti is really good though. Throw some sauteed garlic spinach or other green vegetable in there and it’s almost like you’re eating a well-rounded meal.)
I was going to write something smart here
but instead I’m just waxing poetic in my head like a fucking gourmand about the junk food I’m working on in stages because there’s enough for two helpings tonight & one for tomorrow’s breakfast too. (I like to be prepared.)
So, I guess, scratch that.
